Dirty Old Prom Queen

In '98 I was the prom queen and in '06 I hang out with queens. I'm a private tutor during the day and a comedian at night in ol' NYC. I just can't seem to get out of high school...can someone call the custodian? Vesuvio, I'm locked in!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

I've Been Tagged

Luckily, it's washable spray paint. It would be sooo embarrassing to have "Neck Face" written all over my actual face forever.

JK, you guys!!! Nobody graffitied me! I was tagged by my blogger friend East Side Girl and so I am going to fill out her questionnaire. This is like a weird blog forward. But it will help people who don't know me, get to know me better. Here goes:

What is your earliest film-related memory?
I left Fantasia screaming my face off because of the ghost-like brooms and the fat hippolerinas. I also remember watching Ghostbusters once a day when I was little. That Bill Murray is a real dream.

Name two favorite lines from movies.
1) "Bastian, why don't you do what you dreamed? BASTIAN!! Call. My. Name!" Childlike Empress from The Neverending Story. What can I say? I'm a douche. Also, does anyone...ANYONE...know what the hell Bastian says? My friend Jon says that it is something like "Moonflower," but I do not know if this is correct. I tried watching it on closed captioning once and when he screams his mother's name in the storm, it literally said, "(screams his mother's name)." I feel awkward that I revealed that.

2) "Still surf?" Patrick Swayze
"Everyday." Keanu Reeves. Point Break might just be the best movie on earth for retarded lines. "You're young, dumb, and full of cum." Albeit disgusting, this was a fine moment of poignancy for Gary Busey speaking to Keanu Reeves.

Name three jobs you'd do if you could not work in "The Biz."
1) A dance teacher -- but only for gifted students.

2) I would have a pot holder stand outside of my apartment building. You know, for the locals.

3) Invent a hair device that would give a woman , not waves, but like little zigzags. And I would call it the "Zipper." No, no that's boring. The..."Crimper"... oh that's good. "The Crimper." I gotta write that down.

Name four jobs you have actually held outside the Industry.
1) I'm a private tutor at this very moment.

2) I worked at the Gap for a summer. One time, I chased a woman from the Gap to Eddie Bauer because I found her perfect jean size. Needless to say, the Eddie Bauer employees were nonplussed.

3) I was a student tour guide while attending college. I answered pressing questions like, "Does your cafeteria serve corn? My daughter loves corn."

4) I worked at my boarding school student union restaurant called the RK cafe. This place was not unlike the Peach Pit from Bev Hills 90210 or The Max from Saved By the Bell.

Name three book authors you like.
I'll be honest, I hate book questions. Everyone is so judgmental. You either sound pretentious or stupid. There are so many wonderful authors out there that I have enjoyed, please don't judge these choices. I really believe in all of them...equally.
1) Dostoevsky
2) Darwin
3) Dr. Atkins

Name two movies you'd like to remake or properties you'd like to adapt.
I'd like to star in the live action version of Shrek as well as An American Tale. "And there's nooooo cats in America and the streets are paved with cheeeeese!"

And now to pass on the tradition of this taggery...

You're it my best friends.




  • At 6:23 PM, Blogger Crystal said…

    Oh my god, one the greatest mysteries of all time has to be the name that is screamed (or not) at the end of the Neverending Story. I guess they named it that for a reason, if we can't figure it out, it will never end. I am glad to know that I don't have to rent it and do the closed caption thing.

  • At 7:29 PM, Blogger Alice said…

    According to this website the name is Moon Child.


    I only know this because my roommates and I decided to watch this movie again one random evening and wondered the same thing.

  • At 9:12 PM, Blogger Lang said…

    ALICE!!! Thank god!! You are the best! I can't believe I never thought to go to the website.

  • At 10:47 PM, Blogger Fun Joel said…

    Thanks for participating! :-) 100% pure adrenalin! (By the way, screenwriter John August also mentioned giving campus tours as one of his jobs! www.johnaugust.com for that)

  • At 7:58 PM, Blogger Chox said…

    Neck Face has tagged in my neighborhood, too. :-)

    That guy gets around!

  • At 5:06 PM, Blogger snob in the city said…

    Just thinking about the Neverending Story I have so many things to say...

    - Moon Child was his mom's name?? That is wack! Always knew that the writers had to be smoking a doobie, but didn't think they were full blown hippies.

    - Atreyu was my first crush ever! Why doesn't VH1 catch up with him? I wonder what ever become of the lovely lad...

  • At 10:39 PM, Blogger FDF said…

    Other, less serious side effects may be more likely to occur. Continue to take valium and talk to your doctor if you experience drowsiness, dizziness, or clumsiness


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