Dirty Old Prom Queen

In '98 I was the prom queen and in '06 I hang out with queens. I'm a private tutor during the day and a comedian at night in ol' NYC. I just can't seem to get out of high school...can someone call the custodian? Vesuvio, I'm locked in!

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Baby Disclaimer

It just occurred to me that I need to clear a few things up about my little blog. I would like to take a minute to point out that this blog is not about me being the prom queen in the cool clique in high school (well, actually...) or my flawless complexion or my attractive family members or some girl who owns a flock of prize-winning poodles and parades them around town wearing nothing but a fruit roll-up bikini. No, this is not a bragging blog. This blog is not full of itself. This blog does not sleep with the head cheerleader and then give up all of the details to the underclassmen in the boy's locker room. Yes, I was the prom queen. Yes, I was popular (add an eye roll, sigh, and a shoulder shrug here). Yes, my brother is an adorable skater/surfer type with flaxen hair and a superstar smile. But I merely speak to these facts so that I can juxtapose them with my current situation as an irresponsible, poor, and often uncoordinated adult. These facts are facts that I carry around like a lace-lined, kitten-printed, security blanket. I know that when I finish this six-foot meatball sub in my lap and am stricken with gastro-intestinal pains, that while sitting on my porcelain throne, I can always fall back on my title as prom queen. Always. Even if I had malaria or was arrested for robbing.

I promise that at some point I will give you all the prom queen story. I am just trying to find a picture or two from that blessed event.


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