Dirty Old Prom Queen

In '98 I was the prom queen and in '06 I hang out with queens. I'm a private tutor during the day and a comedian at night in ol' NYC. I just can't seem to get out of high school...can someone call the custodian? Vesuvio, I'm locked in!

Thursday, December 29, 2005

"Noony" Update

My bestie Jules has just called me on the phone to tell me how she somehow got Lubriderm lotion on her unitard. Obviously, your first question might be: "Why does she own a unitard?" My answer: "Because it makes her happy." Anywho, this disgusting little piece of information just led us to create the "nooniest" word ever:


Please keep in mind that we are not talking about a Crisco-covered fraternity boy or a "LUBRETARD."

P.S. If you did not read my earlier post where I defined "noony," it's basically my favorite word and I use it to describe anything that relates to nasty things middle-aged women might do, like calling "flip-flops" "thongs" or wearing shoulder pads or carrying Binaca in a The Sak handbag. By owning a unitard, Jules has just flashed her badge of nooniness, which is just fine, because there's a little "noon" inside all of us.


  • At 4:36 PM, Blogger hot lips said…

    Speak for yourself, biatch.

    Oh wait. I like craft shows.


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